It is the real, and not the map, whose vestiges persist here and there in the deserts that are no longer those of the Empire, but ours. The desert of the real itself.

‘It’s a circus’, ‘it’s a theatre’, ‘it’s a movie’; all these old adages are ancient naturalist denunciations. This is no longer what is at issue. What is at issue this time is turning the real into a satellite, putting an undefinable reality with no common measure into orbit with the phantasma that once illustrated it”

I don’t remember the last time I tried to write something. To be honest, I long ago gave up on literature; anything symbolic or poetic. For some reason, I even struggle with just ordinary texts in messengers. 

I try to avoid being part of linguistic discourse: I can’t talk, not literally, but it seems I can’t reach others; it feels so hollow. Everything is so post- or meta- that I don’t even bother myself to try.

It’s actually painful not to be able to take part in any decision being made. But this is how it is. 

Whatever I’ve been fighting for is meaningless. I’ve lost. My hometown is nowhere to be found, it’s just ashes. The war threat is no more than real. It visited me, attacked me, broke my bones and left me soulless. 

I thought I was a fighter, an activist; that I would spend all of my resources protecting the ideology that seemed right at the time. Now I’m in Berlin and I’m facing the existential psychosis that long awaited me. 

Was the fight I started in 2019 even worth it? I don’t know. As a Kafkian character I’m just being thrown into the circumstances, and see no exit. 

Who am I? What is the actual fight? What is my role in that? Questions never to be answered, as I’m no one with nothing to be worthy of attention of capitalistic best-selling binary-coded machinery.

What did I do wrong? Was there any chance to alter the reality? I really doubt it. The policies get harder; and you have no vote from the senate to change it at least slightly.

Being weak is a synonym for describing human beings nowadays. I know that I am weak. And the others didn’t go any further. At least I see it this way. No matter what we do as a community it’s overshadowed by governments that only pretend they care for you.

“Liberté, égalité, fraternité” is no more, it’s just fake; it’s something that no longer exists. We can pretend it does but is it really so? No more revolution is ever possible, No more change.